[ dean wants to huff at the words that come with the smile thrown his way, but the rest of it silences him rather easily. cas has always held him as someone important, a fact of their friendship which has often made dean uncomfortable. he's really not all that special, never has been, yet castiel always claims to see something there...
maybe all the endless adoration and faith thrown at him finally made him soft and mushy for the angel. never say never, and all that other stuff. ]
It's a little strange. But I guess most things about you are.
[ fondness laces the words, something he can never quite help even with the situation being what it is.
but as quickly as the fondness is there, it's gone again. enough for dean to stop walking, falling behind from cas by a few feet or so. this is all... it's clarifying, yet with the confession, with the story he now knows, dean feels just as confused as he did before. he needs time, they both probably know that, but for cas...
he sighs, the sound heavy, then looks at the angel. ]
I'm sorry, Cas. About-- I don't know. Everything. [ these past few months, the silence and anger he's put on the angel since the kiss. and also-- ] It's like I stole something from you. And now I can't-- I'm not him, and... [ and he can't bring him back, can't remember any of it. he's still dean, cas had said so himself, yet he feels like he's come between cas and this other-him somehow. ]
I guess I just... I mean, you deserve to be happy.
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Date: 2014-08-04 05:27 pm (UTC)maybe all the endless adoration and faith thrown at him finally made him soft and mushy for the angel. never say never, and all that other stuff. ]
It's a little strange. But I guess most things about you are.
[ fondness laces the words, something he can never quite help even with the situation being what it is.
but as quickly as the fondness is there, it's gone again. enough for dean to stop walking, falling behind from cas by a few feet or so. this is all... it's clarifying, yet with the confession, with the story he now knows, dean feels just as confused as he did before. he needs time, they both probably know that, but for cas...
he sighs, the sound heavy, then looks at the angel. ]
I'm sorry, Cas. About-- I don't know. Everything. [ these past few months, the silence and anger he's put on the angel since the kiss. and also-- ] It's like I stole something from you. And now I can't-- I'm not him, and... [ and he can't bring him back, can't remember any of it. he's still dean, cas had said so himself, yet he feels like he's come between cas and this other-him somehow. ]
I guess I just... I mean, you deserve to be happy.